Gatlinburg must want me to feel welcome because I was greeted on Sunday morning by two male mallards swimming in the creek outside our hotel room. Later, after Steve left, I wandered down the street to Subway for lunch. The place was packed with three large families and their brood of children (8-10 in all ranging from 18 months to 10 years). They were taking up all but one of the tables and making quite a mess. But I digress. As I was attempting to enjoy my sandwich, and ignoring the stares of the children, I saw two mallards walking down the street. They were so cute! One of the ladies exclaimed, “Look at those mallard geese.” Dumbass.