Talk Talk

Yesterday I went to lunch with my boss and told him how unhappy I was with work. I came down to me spending too much time in the office with nothing to do (except work on my blog, of course). I left the conversation open with the idea that he would help guide me in my decision. Instead he told me he’d been holding back work and he could give me much more to do if I needed it. The time for subtleness was over. I had to just come right out and tell him I was sick of the job and I wanted to do jewerly full time. However, in my chickenshitness ways, I couldn’t just up and quit. Dammit! When I mentioned a leave of absence he said he’d love to support me but he needed me here sometimes. Dammit again! Then he went on to say he was surprised I was still here anyway. I wish I didn’t want the money. I guess it comes down to me wanting the money more than the artistic freedom. I wanted to talk it over with Steve last night, but we didn’t have time before Lara came over to work in the studio. I need to either quit bitching or leave. Forget any words of wisdom any of you have. I’m sure you’ve told me before and I just can’t get it through my thick skull. Maybe Steve’s new position will eventually make up the difference. That is, unless he gets more speeding tickets like he did yesterday. Bad monkey.