Every time I have a garage sale I swear I will never have another one, yet a year or two goes by and I find myself knee-deep in clutter and planning another sale. This year, Valerie emailed me asking if I was interested in having one with her and I decided I could scrape together a good amount of crap worthy of the work. Last weekend we had the sale at her house and made a respectable amount of cash and got rid of a huge amount of stuff. Still, I was reminded why I hate these things in the first place.
* The tools are not for sale so please stop asking. If they were for sale, they’d be on a table and priced. Joking about buying them does not endear you to me.
* Please do not smoke in my garage. Yes, I know it’s outside, but I still don’t want to inhale your second-hand smoke. Plus, it’s really rude.
* Just because the end of the driveway is clear does not mean you can pull up in it and park. Unless you have a severe handicap that prevents you from walking too far, park on the street.
* I am not Walmart, Target or Dillard’s. I do not have tissue to wrap that $1.00 figurine you just bought or a box for the excessive amount of stuff you want to purchase. The boxes you see stacked in the corner are for boxing up what’s left to donate. Please stop begging for one. If you’re going to do that much shopping, plan ahead and bring your own box/bag.
* Yes, I will take less, but the more obnoxious you are about bargaining, the less I will budge. Be nice and fair and I’m willing to deal.
* No, I don’t have a place for you to try on clothes. The jeans are $1.00. If you’re not willing to take a chance then don’t buy them.
* Thank you for sharing your life story with me. It was fascinating.
Despite all the annoying people it was a good sale and we made enough to buy the patio table and chairs we’d been eyeing at Lowe’s. Plus, we got rid of a ton of stuff and Goodwill got a really nice donation last weekend!